sam in the city, 2021 edition
What has two thumbs and is a shitty blogger?
Cliff Notes of this last year: decided to divorce, started co-parenting, moved back to Cincinnati even though I'm from Dallas, father in law passed suddenly and right at Christmas, my Grandpa Sam passed right after Christmas, I started a new job, and then, and mother fucking then, I started my own coffee company.
I think that about covers it, mostly.
I know 2020 has been hard on many of us and it did not let up on me. After 14 years of marriage, my husband and I decided to divorce. And it's been one a tough year. I've wanted to write about so much of it, and I did... I just didn't publish it. While I'm not opposed to talking about 'things' on here, I just wanted to get through it first.
And now I'm ready to write.
So, in picking up the pen again... I mean, the keyboard, I started writing this particular blog and soon realized (thanks to one my favorite apps, TimeHop) that it had been exactly one full year of living a part, to the day. I can't even believe it, I can't believe all that's happened since.
Who gets married to get divorced? Exactly. No one plans this, but we all know it happens. And I can't even believe I'm about to say this, but we get praised a ton on how we well have handled it, and I kinda can't even wrap my head around.. I don't want to say how well it's turned out... but to have it be as we are, it's more than I ever could have asked for. And we'll talk more about this, I'm sure, in future blogs. It's just been a one day at a time kinda thing. I mean, something so big....you just can't wrap your head around it, and you have to take it one day at a time. The feelings are big, they are temporary, they come and go and it's been a bit much. And then some.
In those days of co-parenting, of being hands on to our toddler, then packing a bag to take off to a tiny lil apartment and having quite the opposite life.... sooooooo much free time on my hands, no kid, no dog or cat under my feet, no husband. It was just an odd existence. Alllllllll of this of course was going on during Rona, at the beginning of it, and made it all the more weird/hard/wild/exhausting.... and it just became all the more clear, Tampa was not for us anymore.
So WKRP it is. Mr D is from here, we shared 8 years here together, and Cincy just made sense. Being back here is what I like to call "Cincinnati Part II." Of course I would love to be home in Dallas, but my family is moving to Houston and a huge part of where we are in life is to be with family/loved ones as we navigate, um... everything.
I actually love it here, it just feels good to be here. Don't get me wrong, I'd rather be in Texas, and it's definitely been tough to live in that. I truly miss my home state, my friends and the life that I had there. It's one thing to move away from your home for a man, but to move for a man you're divorcing.... who does that? Apparently this shitty blogger. But besides that, I am happy to be back in the Natti.
While Cincinnati has had some perks, it has had some sorrows. Unfortunately not three months after we moved back, my father in law passed just so unexpectedly. Luckily he, Mr D and our daughter had weekly dinners and had some quality time together. He was soooo happy about his granddaughter and told alllll his friends about Willow. Not having anything other than an old ass flip phone, he had print outs of W he'd proudly show his friends, so to have her here, in the flesh, he was just happy. The night he passed, he had been with them, so it was a huge shock to get that call. And again, it was right at Christmas.
Then right after, my sweet Grandpa Sam passed. He was 91, he lived a great life, and I'm so very thankful for that.
But yea, it's been a lot. Especially, especially to go through all this during a pandemic. I mean, 2008 was one thing (lost business/way of living and my brother died within 24 hours), but this Rona/quarantine shit has been hard. In so many ways.. I will say that I'm so very thankful for my friends. I really mean it, my buds, with allllll their life happening, plus, COVID, they thought of me on so many occasions. Sending me gifts, written cards filled with words of hope, love and encouragement. It meant a lot and will always.
With that... I WANT TO SEND A HUUUUUUGE SHOUTOUT TO MY BUDS, MY GIRLFRIENDS + MY GUYFRIENDS.... I LOVE YOU SOFA KING MUCH!!
And here's to way better years ahead!!
sam in the fucking city
PS: I just started my own coffee company can't wait to share. In the mean time find me on Instagram @wake.me.bake.me.com!